Friday, October 26, 2007

FireWeight

Ellie and her friends went to Puck Fair, a local NYC bar, in search of manweight. When one is on a real manweight hunt, one must think about the bar with the most potential for weight. Manweight in uniform tend to hang out together and in select bars. Uniformweight is always a safe bet. Like shooting fish in a barrel. Ellie shot one alright. She began sending out the vibe to this tall fireman. His broad muscular shoulders were a good indication of some solid weight. After flirting a lot and drinking more, the two of them headed back to Ellie's place. She had no intention of having sex with him but wanted some hot weight, and who better to get some hot weight from than a man that works with fire. Things progressed once they were in the bedroom (as they tend to). He started jerking himself off and moaning. Ellie closed her eyes, arching her head back, reveling in the great weight she was getting when all of a sudden she was the one that got shot…in the face, by Fireweight's own hose. It put any heat between him and Ellie right out.


ShortWeight

Once upon a short manweight there was a girl named Amanda. During her weekly Wednesday night visit to Villanova University, her best friend's college, she would get weight from this rather small man. He was definitely smaller than her, considering his head was as big as one of her boobs, but he was good weight. After a wild night of making out with Shortweight against the wall of PJ Henry's, Amanda and another good friend, Penelope, went back to his house. Shortweight's roommate joined the weight-night party and started hooking up with Penelope. All four of them ended up in Mateweight's bedroom. Shortweight, who was lying on top of Amanda, got up for a second. When the weight returned it was different; it was Mateweight. It was a weight swap! Oh weight a night…


BallerWeight

Nicole had an on-again-off-again weight from one hot piece of manweight who was a basketball player at Georgetown University। Ballerweight was good looking, cut, and possessed an ass that should be used as the sculpture industry's ass standard. She hadn't seem him in a while, but when her phone rang on a random Tuesday night and it was a very drunk Ballerweight, she shut down her computer and hopped into the shower immediately, scrubbing up to prepare for her weight-training session. When he arrived at her place, things were quickly taken to the bed where she began to suck on his manmeat to get the game going. Not far into the warm up, Ballerweight said he was going to come. Nicole could definitely be one of the starting five on a dick-sucking team, but this would have to be some sort of all-city record for "coming time". Ballerweight shoots and he pees!!!..."You are peeing in my mouth! Time the fuck out, playa!" How did he not know he was peeing and not coming? The only reaction Nicole could think of, besides crying, was laughing. This had gone from manweight to wet weight, and by wet we don't mean the good kind.


IrishWeight

Home from college, our friend Sally settled back in with her parents for the summer. Very soon after, she met this hot piece of Irish weight at Nevada Smith's and began dating him. He was a carpenter who she could barely understand, but between his blue eyes and smokin' hot bod, the conversation wasn't exactly the focal point. After a few dates, Sally couldn't resist extending an invitation back to her place. Eh, I mean her parents' place. After rolling his weight around for a while, Sally decided she'd had enough weight for one night and walked him to her elevator. Irishweight pulled her into the elevator for one last kiss although she was only clad in boxers, a titi shirt from her night out, and one sock. When they reached the lobby, she realized she'd forgotten her keys, and needless to say, her cell phone. Sally's solution was a piggy back ride to the nearest payphone (the corner) and a collect call to her mother to let her know that she was going to be buzzing and to let her in. Please do take the time to think about what went through her mother's mind upon seeing the elevator open and Sally step out. For weight's sake!

9 comments:

Unknown said...

This is so funny! I love it.

Anonymous said...

This is fuckin hilarious! It's so refreshing to read a NY "guide" written by women who are obvioulsy very funny AND very intelligent!

Love the concept. Can't wait to see more...

Anonymous said...

love.

it's funny...and I can dance to it!

Anonymous said...

That guy is not from the East Village, I know for a fact.

Anonymous said...

He lives in the East Village dumb ass!

noname in a narrownook said...

now that i'm back on the singles scene, i'm sure i'll have some good manweight stories for you soon!

congrats bec, a success, as always.

Anonymous said...

That Nicole sure sounds like a whore.. Is there anyway that I can get her phone number?

Manny said...

These are some funny stories!You ladies are really doing your thing. Keep up the good work.

Anonymous said...
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